march

April 01, 2024

Things I enjoyed in the month of March:

 Travis Baldree's, Legends & Lattes:

After twenty-two years of adventuring, Viv had reached her limit of blood and mud and bullshit. An orc's life was strength and violence and a sudden, sharp end―bur she'd be damned if she'd let it finish that way.
It was time for something new.


There is a little space inside me, heart/brain/mysterious matter, that's lain empty for years without my knowing it.
A small, shallowly lit cavern biding its time in silence until the right genre came along to inhabit it and make a home for itself; that genre is Cosy Fantasy.
And Legends & Lattes is the first story to shuffle into one of those corners and lay down the first piece of clutter that signifies "home" - to me, at least; white-walled, empty homes freak me the fuck out.
It's not a genre I knew I needed, that I'd even contemplated, but it's something my heart/brain/mysterious matter had clearly been calling out for, especially in the last few years of constant anxiety.
As Travis Baldree said:

I [...] think there is a generation of people who grew up on fantasy, who love the genre, but are interested in hearing about things other than slaying dragons and finding treasures and fighting wars. I think Terry Pratchett understood this very well, and maybe we're just putting a new name to it now.

say this is a genre I've never contemplated, but actually I think it's simply something I didn't have a name for, yet pondered often.
When I fall in love with characters, any and all, but specifically those who inhabit stories where strife and hardship must be battled through to reach their happy ending, I always hope for more after the last page is turned.
For me, the story doesn't end where the author leaves me, the characters don't stop existing, and I desperately crave time with them in their hard won day-to-day lives.
It was a long running "joke" between my sisters and I that after the first series of Good Omens aired, we would've been perfectly happy to traverse Crowley and Aziraphale's relationship in the second season secluded away in that longingly mentioned cottage in the South Downs with them making endless cups of delicious warm things, reading forbidden literature to each other, and simply existing - and if the show doesn't end that way, I will be bloody furious, Gaiman.
We joked, but really, we craved.
I think everyone who welcomes stories and characters into their biology does this, dwells on those other worlds often, rereads to break bread once again, creates art and writes fanfiction to keep the story going.
It's a natural thing to crave when you've invested so deeply, and Travis Baldree so obviously craves this too, because that's entirely what Legends & Lattes is about: what happens after.
What happens when all the battles are over, when the blows stop coming, when our heroes can finally sit the fuck down and have a nice cup of something without worrying for their lives.
And it's everything I could've ever wanted.
I don't want to divulge too much, because the charm of Baldree's debut novel is that it isn't some sweeping, high octane fantasy that'll thrill you from start to finish, but instead a soft, lulling adventure into the mundane that asks nothing in return other than your attention.
But it will sweep you, gently, sweetly, warmly.
Viv, our protagonist, an orc mercenary looking for a better, simpler life after years of working as a sword for hire finds herself in the city of Thune and in the market to open a coffee shop.
GIF by Warcraft

...
I mean, that's reason enough to stop everything you're doing and read it immediately, but it's the subtlety of what Baldree's doing that makes you not only stay, but settle in, make yourself comfortable, and purposefully forget to leave.
The comparison between his story and the ideal reading situation, with the perfect mug of [insert drink of choice] and the supreme level of comfort is hard to ignore, because it's exactly how L&L feels.
We never stray too far from Viv's shop, our encounters with new people are quiet and welcoming, and the growth the story experiences is, not ungenerously, plodding.
And I truly mean that as a good thing; L&L bears the same uninterrupted, unbothered air of finally sitting down to do that task, that thing, that you've been waiting for the perfect moment to do and you've at last carved out the time for.
Even better? You know you'll be able to carry it out peacefully, without anyone interrupting, with your background music of choice, wearing your comfiest clothes, and truly enjoy the fuck out of it.
And it's so. damn. satisfying.
As Viv and Cal (love Cal, all the applause for Cal!) work to rebuild and furnish the coffee shop, you work alongside them, hammering, sawing, sneezing sawdust; and with the arrival of Tandri (equal amounts of applause for Tandri! We love a marshmallow succubus with mad typography skills) the interior starts to take on colour, the heart of the place begins to beat a little more loudly; and when Amity (she's just like Charles, except he's afraid of sneezes...) and Thimble (I have this list of fictional animals I'd die for... top of the list, immediately) strut and shuffle softly inside the doors, the embodiment of protection, warmth, and sustenance in one gigantic dire cat and a small rodential body, Viv's place at last feels like the home she always dreamed of.
And in some ways, we helped build it.

There's a kind of melody to this form of storytelling, a song you've always known and now the lyrics have finally been revealed, but you don't start singing, instead you continue to hum like before, content to simply know the words and that other people do too.
There's such comfort in that, especially in a genre that is largely dominated by adventure and mayhem, to finally be gifted the time to breathe and live with characters who've come to mean so much.
And I know what some might be thinking: that's so boring! Where's the excitement?!
Trust me, Baldree didn't skimp on the excitement, it's just delivered differently with its gentle, forward pacing, and in the midst of that familiar, calming mundanity there are stumbling blocks to overcome, old enemies making unnecessary trouble, and powerful new foes to contend with.
But more importantly, new love burgeoning, lifelong friendships forming, cinnamon rolls the size of your head being baked by deft little paws, and a family home forging its way into existence one coffee cup (and Thimblet) at a time.
#food from kitchen ghosts

L&L isn't a thrill a minute in the traditional sense, but it is the kind of story that you can read with luxuriating sips, a few chapters here, a gulp of words when the thirst strikes, but never rushing, always savouring until the last swallow, where you'll look inside one of the café's customised mugs, made just for you, and wish to start all over again.
I'm unsure if there's anything more comforting in reading than that feeling, of being fully nourished by narrative but with endless room for more.
And Legends & Lattes is the ideal place to find it, the perfect resting spot for the weary reader.
So, if you find yourself tired, run down, and flagging, stop by Viv's, there's good food, good coffee, good music (Pendry, the sweater boy bard we all love and deserve), and best of all, good company.


Tandri and Viv brewed side by side, working both handles in a flustered but energized confusion, nearly tripping over one another to fill orders.
Thimble's cinnamon rolls disappeared in minutes, but he had wisely already set more dough to rise while the first batch was in the oven.
With the stove running full blast, the shop was hotter than usual, and muggy from the steaming rolls. Both women sweated through their shirts within the hour. The chatter of the crowd, Thimble's clatter, and the hiss and rumble of the gnomish coffee machine filled the air with dizzying madness.
As the morning crept toward noon, the crowd slackened but never lapsed for more than ten minutes. The dining area sang with a lively clamor, and the rumble of conversation pervaded. Customers dallied longer, enjoying their baked goods and sipping their drinks, and for the first time, more sat at the big communal table than sought the relative solitude of a booth.
Viv leaned on the counter, studying their faces, and saw, at last, what she'd been too nervous to hope for. She found it in half-lidded eyes and a slow, deliberate swallow. In cupped hands around the warmth of a mug and the lingering enjoyment of the last taste.



Fanart:
Alicia Ramos Castillo

Rosie Fowinkle

Eleni Achilleos Hardman

vanemiin

Tangeine Eileen

https://www.tumblr.com/catter-bug/708356448072122368/just-finished-reading-legends-and-lattes-and-it
Catterbug

And a couple links to Jawsstone's work because they aren't embeddable but soooo worth a hyperlink:

Viv and Tandri

Blackblood

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Juliette Buttigieg's Ineffable Duckies:

And what do we feed the duckies?

I love the hubbies in this style; Aziraphale's chonky cheeks and Crowley's pointy ears?
Perfection.
Also snuggles:

...
media4.giphy.com/media/m73O9b0oLvaepxrZYz/giphy.gi...

Let's do more, here's more:
Camille Cailloux

gomens_nasai

Balon

Stevie

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One Day:

...
I fucking hate this story.

[Spoilers to follow, leave now]

This is over a decade long grudge, fyi.
And actually, actually, I love this story, love it with the entirety of my stupid heart.
Until the very end.
Where David Nicholls took the chicken shit route.
And ruined the entire thing.
Totally tanked it.
Razed it to the fucking ground.
And I fully believe, with my whole ass, that he did it so the book wouldn't be categorised in Romance, and instead smugly sit in the Literary Fiction section where happy endings are explicitly verboten.
There's no other explanation why he would write the perfect slow burn, decades long, friends-to-lovers romance and end it with killing Emma off for no fucking reason.
Because there was no reason.
It didn't add to the story, it didn't make my brain sit up and think, it didn't in any way cause thoughts of life is fleeting, enjoy it while you can, no, all it did was make me fucking furious by taking a genuinely wonderful story of two people fucking up and falling in love, and cheapening it with a death so it wouldn't end up on the shelves of the most shat upon genre in fiction - which, by the way, happens to be a fucking amazing genre.
...
I told you, I've been stewing on this for over a decade, watching Anne Hathaway and Jim Sturgess balls it up in 2011 didn't make it better, and thirteen years later, Netflix's adap has, if anything, made me even angrier.
Why?
Because Ambika Mod is my perfect Emma, and not just because I love her immensely (watch This Is Going to Hurt, it's impeccable and does in fact, hurt), but because she embodies Emma's cynicism, her grumpy wit, her furrowed brow intelligence, her devotion to the people she loves, and what it feels like to love someone who can't get out of their own way.
and oh, my dreams — One Day (2024) | 1x01

She made me laugh, she made me angry, she made me cry, she did everything Emma is supposed to do to you, and she was wasted in a production that did everything right - visually, narratively, emotionally - but was always doomed to fail because the ending's such a fucking disappointment.
(Sidenote: Leo Woodall is not my Dexter, but in the last three episodes he was outstanding)
And it makes me question why we keep adapting romance, for romance lovers, that rejects the happy ending.
(I'm all for an unhappy ending that makes sense for the narrative, I'll take the pain if it benefits the story)
We saw it with The Time Traveler's Wife - I won't start, we'd be here forever, and then with Normal People, which I adore and admire as a truly fine piece of television with acting I never quite manage to stop thinking about, but after all the work we put in with the MC, Sally Rooney rends them apart at the end.
In fairness, it's not a devastating end, because for me Connell and Marianne will at some point find each other again - they're magnets, it's inevitable, but it's still such a depriving finish to a story that demands a lot.
Where's the nourishment? Where's the reward?!
And we're about to see this again in the new Anne Hathaway and Nicholas Galitzine movie, The Idea of You, based on Robinne Lee's novel of the same name, which I know for a fact ends with the couple going their separate ways.
...
FFS!
Do you know why romance gets shit on all the time? Because hope and love and happy endings are considered "girly", "easy", "unintellectual".
Girly? It depends on your definition I suppose, and how much you hate women.
But easy? Unintellectual?
To that I say:
Twenty Century Fox Meme Gfy GIF - Twenty Century Fox Meme Gfy Go Fuck Yourself GIFs

That's the patriarchy talking, my friend; romance is one of the most generous, emotionally intelligent, exciting, thoughtful, representative genres out there.
And not only does it express itself with the same range of skill as any other genre out there, but it champions the happy ending in all its myriad forms.
So, Hollywood, production companies, et al, if you want to adapt romance for the romance reader, do us a favour and choose the ones that don't makes us homicidal?
I'll make it easy, here's a list of authors to get you started:

Sierra Simone
Kathryn Nolan
Talia Hibbert
Roxie Noir
Tessa Bailey
Alisha Rai
Becca and Krista Ritchie
Kati Wilde
Mia West
Helen Hoang
Eve Dangerfield
Staci Hart
Charlotte Stein
Olivia Dade
Karla Sorensen
Anyta Sunday
Melissa Blue
Kristen Callihan
Jennifer Ashley
Christina Lauren
Ivy Owens
Chloe Liese
Kate Stewart
Roan Parrish
Cole McCade
Kelly Hunter
E.M. Lindsey
Maria Luis
Stacy Reid
Hannah Bonam-Young
Kate Goldbeck
Evie Mitchell
Molly O'Keefe

And that's just contempory/historical.
If you need paranormal, DM me, I've got the goods.
#filmedit from FYEAHMOVIES

Addendum: The list above is missing a few key authors because they've already had adaptations or are in the process of adaptating, eg. Sally Thorne and Emily Henry.
And obviously I'm trying to diversify my romance (and all) reading, so future lists will have way more disabled, chronic illness,  LGBTQIA+, POC authors.

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Pascal Blanché:

Do you see how easily this could be mistaken for A.I. but how very much it isn't?
DO YOU SEE?!?
Do you see the difference?
Pascal Blanché is a prime example of why computer technology used to make art is essential, but using it to churn out stolen, rejigged copies is bullshit and should be made illegal until A.I. becomes "opt in" instead of "opt out".
Nothing Can Make Me Change My Mind Luke Skywalker GIF - Nothing Can Make Me Change My Mind Luke Skywalker Mark Hamill GIFs

I will also never shut up about how much I hate A.I.
Sorry.
...
The office steve carell michael scott GIF on GIFER - by Nikree

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Name a book that... prompt by readingbyemily:

Biannually I will do something bookstagrammy.
Ta da!

Gives you comfort: A Court of Mist and Fury by Sarah J. Maas

Rhys and Feyre have had a chokehold on me since 2018, I think about them all the time (when I'm not thinking about Nessian, which is also all the fucking time), and it's not letting up.
Velaris is the softest place for my brain to land.
A fantastical cushion, if you will.
If I'm feeling blue, or anxious, or just full of yearning, I crack open certain chapters to spend a few minutes with my beloved idiots.
Whenever I'm not so quietly tearing my hair out for the next book in the series to come out, that is; it's been ten thousand years and I have no chill left, I need Az's story!
Give It To Me Please GIF by CBS


Makes you sad: The Song of Achilles by Madeline Miller

I could recognize him by touch alone, by smell, I would know him blind, by the way his breaths came and his feet struck the earth. I would know him in death, at the end of the world.

Can't talk about it, moving on!
Weeping GIFs | Tenor


You didn't like: The Southern Book Club's Guide to Slaying Vampires by Grady Hendrix

There aren't enough fiery suns to fuel the passion of my hatred for this fucking book.
Misogynistic piece of shit masquerading as feminism.
If you hate women, don't write stories from our perspective, 'kay?
February 2021: Teenage Bounty Hunters!!!!!
(If you feel like reading my vitriolic review, it lies here and or on GR, pulsating with eternal fury)


You want to read this year: Wolfsong by T.J. Klune

I will do it.
I will, I will, I will.
T.J. Klune's been on my TBR for years and for some reason I've struggled to check any of his oeuvre off my list.
Don't know why, his books look so very much my jam it's not even funny, but my brain's a swamp filled with garbage gremlins who thrive on executive disfunction.
I will thwart the little fuckers though, this will be the year, I swear it on all things fuzzy and lupine!
Summer Seven: Wolf Children Discussion : r/watchinganime
(Also, to finally watch Wolf Children. It's getting ridiculous that I haven't already)


Won't leave your mind: If We Were Villains by M.L. Rio

I truly believe some stories are made to haunt you, and nothing bedevils me quite like the ending to this story.
It's a good kind of pain, though, like pressing your tongue to a split lip, or the firm pressure of pushing down on your fingernail.
A little sting, a singing sort of discomfort.
That's how If We Were Villains makes me feel, so much so I had to search out a balm just to survive it.
El-critico's Whine Corner - General Discussion - Crate Entertainment Forum


Was recommended to you: Expecting Someone Taller by Tom Holt

My mum is the total legend who first introduced me to fantasy (and head banging in the kitchen to Yngwie Malmsteen, amongst other things), and this was one of the very first books she recommended I read.
It's about a lovable dork who accidentally runs over the god Wotan (the German counterpart to Odin) in his badger form and inherits a magical teleporting and shapeshifting helmet.
Much fuckery ensues.
It's genuinely one of the funniest books I've ever read, I suggest it to anyone in need of a new book.
Thanks, mum.
Youre Cool GIF by CBC


Is a childhood favourite: Wyrd Sisters by Terry Pratchett

I don't know if "childhood" is where I'd classify this because I didn't start reading with any degree of consistency until I hit my early twenties.
For such a book nerd, I spent most of my adolescence not reading, and one day just decided to read all the classics.
I did that (not all, some, a few).
Enjoyed it (for the most part, kinda, historical writing's too stuffy for me).
But then the need to face-plant gleefully into fantasy became too strong and the Discworld was my first port of call.
After years of ogling my mum's collection (told you she was cool), I finally cracked one open, and inside were cackling wonders.
There are no witches in the literary world I love more than Granny Weatherwax, Nanny Ogg, and Magrat Garlick.
The Witches of Lancre.
Those fearsome fuckers.
Zuzana Čupová

Terry Pratchett really was a gift.
Going Postal Terry Pratchett GIF - Going Postal Terry Pratchett Embuggerance GIFs


You own by haven't read yet: The Name of the Wind by Patrick Rothfuss

It's huge and I'm scared.
Movie gif. Colin Farrell wears an oversized jacket on a busy street. He shrugs his shoulders and has an exaggerated frown on his face like he has no clue what's going on.

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Georgina Chávez:

I'm crying, these are beautiful, and I'm absolutely feral for the painter's bustier.
Goodnight fizzgig GIF - Find on GIFER

Who wouldn't want to wear art on their tits?

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Charlie Jane Anders' Favourite Comedy Films of the 2020s (So Far):

If Charlie Jane Anders is listing her favourite things, then I'm paying full attention.
YARN | SHE HAS IMPECCABLE TASTE, | Gilmore Girls (2000) - S04E06 An Affair  to Remember | Video gifs by quotes | bc0fdafb | 紗

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Kristi O and Muppets:

People who makes things are great, I love them, wouldn't be without them.
But people who make things of stuff I've been obsessed with basically since infancy?

My love for Labyrinth, The Muppets, and Little Shop of Horrors knows no bounds, they're basically perfect in my eyes and Kristi O's recreations of them are *mwah*, gorgeous, perfect, gimme-able.
And then there's this work of crossover genius:
https://www.tumblr.com/komakesthings/740184533785346048/ive-slowly-been-chipping-away-at-drawing-scenes

I need to see this for real.
And I'm not the only one:

It's only logical, right?
As You Wish (The Princess Bride) #ReactionGifs

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Rewatching:
Persuasion

Rewatching this does make me embarrassed that I like the Netflix abomination as much as I do and now count it as a true comfort watch.
Like... I know it's terrible, I really do, and the removal and bastardisation of some of the most iconic lines in the story, and honestly, some of the most beautiful prose in literature, is a fucking travesty and Netflix should be hunted for it.
And the 2007 mini-series is infinitely, unquestionably the superior adaptation, totally worthy of my favourite Austen story, but yeah... I'm trash, I love them both (the book always wins, though!), what can I say?
Timeless Lessons on Love from Jane Austen


Bridgerton

Spitefully rewatching because I won't be viewing Polin's season until June because SPLITTING IT INTO TWO PARTS IS A BULLSHIT MANOEUVRE!
Why do streaming services keep doing this?
Nobody likes it.
Nobody wants a month long break in the middle.
Nobody wants to sip their blorbo stories like patient little gremlins.
We want our historical smut in one sitting, so fast we choke a little, get a belly ache, and immediately ask for more, thank you very much.
...
Saying that, however, my excitement level for Penelope and Colin finally getting their season is off the fucking charts at this point.
Nicola Coughlan is a goddess, a living Persephone, and I can't wait to see her eat. it. up!
Daily Bridgerton — Penelope Featherington and Colin...


Ps. Queen Charlotte is the best season, sorry Kanthony, but Cheorge are goals.

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Sarah Andersen being the most relatable:

...
This may contain: a woman sitting at a table with a glass in front of her and the words it's funny cause it's true



Rotting is my favourite.



...

He just walked in one day and never left.

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March Melodies:
Bombay Bicycle Club ft. Rae Morris // Better Now

Laurel // Wild Things

Pop Goes Ambient (Vancouver Sleep Clinic) ft. Amelia Magdalena // My Love Mine All Mine (Mitski cover)

Holly Humberstone // Work In Progress and Down Swinging

Ariana Grande // we can't be friends (wait for your love)
(The Eternal Sunshine refs are cutting deep)

Braden Bales // ASHED US OUT

Griff // Miss Me Too
(Real talk: this made me bawl)

Olivia Rodrigo // obsessed

awfultune // get high w me

girl in red ft. Sabrina Carpenter // You Need Me Now?

Porter Robinson // Cheerleader

Lizzy McAlpine // I Guess

Keaton Henson // Tokyo Laundry

Hozier // Too Sweet

The Decemberists // Joan in the Garden
(5:15 ... that's so Labyrinth, Bowie, Within You coded, right? I can't be the only one hearing that)

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Trev Cimenski's, the boys didn't know how to like him:


... and he was alone, and everyone could feel it, like steam in the air...
...and me, watching an old man asking strangers to bum sentences, like they were cigarettes...
...and although most of us were alone in the bathhouse, he was the only one who was trying to wash the alone off...


I could listen to Trev ruin my life with hushed observations until its inescapable end.

A poet is a nightingale, who sits in darkness and sings to cheer its own solitude with sweet sounds.

- Percy Bysshe Shelley
A Defence of Poetry

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Catching up with the Belchers (seasons nine to twelve):

I've had this song stuck in my head since season nine:

This episode is what you call "elite television":

And pooping in public's never been so fucking heartwarming (I love Louise/Bob-centric episodes):

These goblins make me laugh so much it makes me ill.
bob's burgers and related miscellany | Bobs burgers, American dad, Bob

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Lucracia Ray:

I either want them... or I am them...

...
More goblincore froggers:

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Ilona Andrews', Magic Claims

I promised myself I wasn't going to read this until House Andrews announced a release date for either the second Iron Covenant book or the sequel to Aurelia Ryder.
promised myself.
...
I'm a weak, weak gremlin person with no concept of delayed gratification.
But in all fairness to me, it was stormy in my brain (and body; chronic pain can go fuck itself right up an evergreen) and I needed my happiest place in fiction to make me feel something other than swirling, anxiety-driven chaos.
A perfectly cromulent reason to break a book pact with oneself, no?
Agree, don't agree, it's happened now, I can't take it back, but now I'm equal parts bloody delighted and furiously pissed off.
Why so?
Because Magic Claims is fucking brilliant and comforting and funny and kickass, and now there isn't anything Kate-based to read in my immediate future.
No fallbacks. No story in waiting. Just a Kate-shaped void and it sucksssssss.
Empty Inside - GIPHY Clips

Reasonably, I know this will end, that HA will release a new book when it's ready, and I'll once again be a happy urban-fantasy-loving goblin, rambling around with furry friends and squashing bad guys.
I even know I could continue on with The Edge series, or start Innkeeper, Hidden Legacy, or the Nevada Baylor trilogy.
(I also know I could just re-read all the KD books but I suck at re-reading. So many books, so little lifespan ⏳)
My brain is perfectly capable of computing this reality, but my idiot heart's stuck on a sobbing loop of BUT NONE OF THEM ARE KATE AND CURRRAAAAANNNNNN!
Remember above when I said I was a weak gremlin person? I'm also a stubborn gremlin person who'll pout 'til she gets what she wants.
And what I want is an Eternal Sunshine machine to erase Magic Claims from my brain, whilst squirrelling away a sneaky little caveat in the good old grey matter that I will not, under any stressed out circumstances, read this book until there are more stories in the near, near, near future.
...
But that's not going to happen because we're building robots instead of mind-fuckery machines, so I'll just scream into the abyss about how fucking great my blorbos are instead.
Love Them GIF by Apple TV+

Magic Claims is everything I love about the Kate Daniels series: its wittiness, its attention to detail, its humanity in a sea of supernaturals.
How its lore is steeped in not only mythology but history, how I never feel info-dumped on, or overwhelmed by descriptions but instead immersed in the landscape.
That when the characters talk they seem like actual people instead of automatons lobbing lengthy, grandiose speeches every time they open their mouths.
And how HA have this magic ability to create villains that aren't your stereotypical, maniacal laughing cartoons we're so often bombarded with in fantasy, but replaced with genuinely terrifying powerhouses with actual personalities.
These are the many and various things that made me the HA fan I am today, and Magic Claims is a perfect love letter to its origins.
With Kate, Curran, and Conlan now settled in Wilmington, building a new home, making a new life, they've truly become the solid unit I knew they would be; with now ten years of distance from the battle of Atlanta, they've had time to shed that former existence of being in constant danger, fending off the villain of the week, and have been able to build the foundations of their family and watch it thrive.
That's everything I've wanted for them since the beginning, since Kate sent that bowl of milk to Curran's table when they were both on separate dates and their story officially began, and now they finally have it.
They talk with more relaxed familiarity now, respect each other with more ferocity, work through their problems together instead of going behind each other's backs in the name of selfless protection, and of course, their bicker-flirting has only reached new peaks.


He scooped me up off my log.
"What are you doing?"
Curran spun around and sprinted to the water with me in his arms. The beach flew by.
"Stop! Curran! Cu―"
He threw me. I hurtled through the air and splashed into the ocean. The water closed over my head.
Aaaa!
I flailed, broke the surface, and gasped. Curran locked me into his arms, his gray eyes laughing.
"You said invigorating, not fucking freezing. Let go of me!"
"Let me warm you up."
"I'll warm myself up!"
His smile gained a wicked edge. "Even more interesting."
I smacked him, kicked him in the chest, and launched into a frenzied freestyle, trying to warm up. I stopped about a minute later. In a calm lake, I would've ended up one hundred yards from where I started. In the ocean, against the current, I made it about fifty.
Curran floated next to me, and he wasn't even breathing hard. It's good to be a werelion.
"Hey, baby."
"You are too much."


They're my most beloved couple in Urban Fantasy (Sorry, Mercy and Adam; sincerest apologies, Toby and Tybalt; you're both a very close second), their love makes me feel loved, and reading them sparks this overload of joy inside every molecule of my body that feels like genuine sorcery.
When they fight together, when they lovingly pick on each other, when they check in with each other.
I love it all.
I love them.


He hugged me tighter. "I love you the way you are. If you choose to change, I will love you still. [...] Stay with me, Kate."
"I love you. Where would I go?"


And I knew Kate knew!
I knew it!
Sorry, tangent, but whilst reading Blood Heir, I was hyperaware of just how not present Kate was in Julie's life (obviously for life-threatening reasons, duh) and how wrong that felt. I know Kate, I know how she thinks and behaves and feels about those she loves, and there is no power in the 'verse that could stop her from getting to her kid if she was in trouble. Not a damn thing. The only thing that would stop her is knowing it would be worse to interfere.
I mean, clearly, Kate'd still be plotting ways to get around that, she's still the pissed off battering ram of a woman she was from the very start, but she's capable of strategy now, especially when it comes to family, so of course she's looking for loopholes, and I expect them to come to fruition very soon.
But still, I knew it!
I love being right about stuff. I'm never right. Plot twists always surprise me. I never figure things out.
So...

The question is, will this lead to a Kate appearance in the next Aurelia Ryder books?
Or perhaps more of the Wilmington series?
Because come on, there's so much new information in this one little novella to fuel a legion of new stories in the KD world, it'd be criminal not to continue.
A few examples:

🗡️ Conlan, for starters

Look, the kid's part shifter (a First, specifically), part descendant of an ancient mage with god-like power, there has to be a story waiting for him in the future. Surely. You cannot take Kate and Curran's DNA, smoosh it together, and not pop out a legend with sarcasm skills to rival his parents.
You cannot. I refuse to believe it.
And HA keep introducing him to new people, new shifters, new friends.
...
How am I not meant to take that as a potential new band of fuzzies and Conlan as their Alpha?
HOW?!


🗡️ Prehistoric shifters

Honestly - and one of my favourite things about HA's storytelling, I did not see this coming.
I can't remember exactly when it's revealed that Curran's a First - a descendant of the original shifters, but it's been a fairly consistently noted aspect of his characterisation throughout the series.
It's why he's an Alpha with such immense power and others simply... aren't.
And now we have actual context for that, we got to see his and Conlan's origins in the flesh, and acknowledge the true potency of their lineage.
...
And then proceed to watch Curran rip its heart out, but... y'know... shifters.
All the same, though, this introduction of prehistoric shapeshifters brings a whole new side to the lore of KD; we know what the Pack can do, we've seen it, but what do the newcomers bring to the table?
How do they differ?
What do they offer?
I'd be really excited to see how they fit into Kate's world and what past wonders they could introduce her to.
Just saying, HA.


🗡️ PACK

Again, this one kinda shocked me, but it really shouldn't've.
I love the Daniels-Lennarts, love them with my full, dumb heart, but there was no way in hell they were going to amble off to a new life and live it peacefully.
No way, that's just not how they roll, and more so, it's not who they are.


"When the shapeshifters jumped us in the forest, and that big one tried to eat my head, and then I stabbed her?"
"Mhm."
"I enjoyed it." And there it was. I said it and waited.
"I know," he said. "After you killed the skull mage, you turned to me and you were smiling. A big, bright smile. Old Kate smile."
"Old Kate?"
"Dangerous Kate. Stabby Kate. My Kate."
I raised my head and leaned it on my bent elbow. "Stabby?"
"Yes. Exciting." He grinned.
So far, so good. "More words, bigger hole, Your Furriness."
"You haven't called me that in forever."
"You haven't roared in forever."
His grin relaxed into a softer smile. "When I was on the wall with Keelan's pack at my back, it felt right. Seeing the enemy come, and meeting them, and stopping them. I missed it. It was a battle, Kate. We haven't been in a battle together in forever."
It was time to stop dipping my toes into the water and just jump in.
Like right about now.
Now would be good.
"Some pair of homicidal maniacs we are," I murmured, buying time.
"We're not maniacs. We do what we have to do, and we do it well. Like it or not, the world needs an occasional roar. Maybe in the future it won't, but for now, it can use it."


want them safe and happy, like it said, it's been a constant desire I've carried since the beginning, but they just aren't those kind of people, they can't be, not when they possess so much power.
Kate's basically a goddess.
Curran's near invincible.
They attract attention, trouble, people in need of rescue and protection; they're leaders who thrive on solving problems, engaging in battles no one else can fight, and keeping people safe.
Run away to Wilmington and play house?
Pfft, not my idiots.


Erra gave me one of her patented ancient power stares, reached over, and slapped an invisible ball in front of her.
"Is that you smacking my head?"
"You are playing a very dangerous game. You've been trying to hide from who you are. First, you tried to do it in Atlanta, and now you're trying to do it here. [...] You're puttering around on this beach, fixing this ruin, and trying to lull yourself into a false sense of security. Do you honestly think that you've solved your problems, child? That if you just stay in this little fortress on the edge of the continent, the world will forget about you, and you can have a quiet life? Even if you ran away to the most remote peak in the Himalayas, it wouldn't matter. Sooner or later, they will come for you, and you won't be ready."


I wasn't expecting the rebuilding of the Pack (or the character assassination of Jim, what's that all about, HA?), though. After the resolute way Curran left his post as the Beast Lord after what the Pack did to Kate when he was dying, and how profoundly Kate hated being the Consort, I would never have thought they'd even contemplate starting anew, let alone do it.
But here we are, they've bagged themselves an impenetrable castle in the woods and a brand new band of shifters to boot.
The Wilmington Pack is a go.


"The Pack was built on a faulty premise," Curran said. "It was bound to break sooner or later."
Karter nodded again.
"Let's make something better," Curran said.
The words sunk in. Karter frowned. "Who?"
"Us," Curran said. "Let's make something better."


So, I repeat, HA cannot leave us this way, it wouldn't be fair.


🗡️ Roland

Dearest dad's gonna get out at some point, right?
...
Honestly, Roland and Kate's relationship is not a bond I thought I'd be so invested it, what with nefarious father figures usually being pretty uncool guys, but Roland is a testament to HA's continually impressive character-building.
Yes, he's a bad guy who's done monstrous things: killed all his children because of their power, killed Kate's mum, tried to kill Kate, amongst other heinous crimes, but somehow, this charming fucker has a way of making you love him.
In part, because he loves Kate so very much.
I know, doesn't make sense when he's so threatened by her power that he attempted to shuffle her off ye olde mortal coil, but that's why he's such a good villain.
He's not solely insane with power, he's not after the apocalypse, he's not full of rage.
He's a wildly intelligent man with too much power, not enough empathy, but an infinite amount of love for his family - when he calls Kate, "Blossom", I get a little squishy inside.
When they behave to his liking, that is.
Ugh, when I write it, it sounds bad, but it's kind of why I love him?
He's not bad, he's not good, he's not even morally grey, he's just... attractive, compelling.
And I know that at some point he's going to escape the prison he's trapped in and make a menace of himself, but the only thing that sparks in me is anticipation.


🗡️ Big bads napping

Short and sweet, this one, it just makes me wonder how many other villains have gone for a millennia-nap and are just waiting for their homicidal alarm clock to go off and take a shot at my girl?
The scope this allows...


Makes you wonder, doesn't it?
Obviously, I'm not the author(s) here, so I get no say in how/if they continue Kate's story, that's not my call, but I don't know, the world they've built is so fucking rich that it would feel wasteful to let it go.
...
But I'm insane with love for Kate, et al., and would love the KD series to go on forever, so I'm perhaps a tad biased.
I love my authors, and I'll trust their judgement, follow them narratively anywhere (and wait patiently while they do it; don't bully your authors to churn books out, people, quality art takes time), but while I still have fingers, I'm going to keep them crossed that this isn't the end.
Manifest Lana Condor GIF - Manifest Lana Condor To All The Boys Ive Loved Before2 GIFs

...
While I was writing this, HA released a schedule:

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Pretty Please GIF - BobsBurgers Please Beg - Discover & Share GIFs


Ps. This scene:


"Stop," Keelan and I ordered at the same time.
Hakeem froze.
I caught up with him. "What is it?"
He pointed with his stick in the direction of the giant pine. Four stone spheres about the size of baseballs were stacked on top of each other in the clearing, about fifteen yards from the big tree. By every law of physics, they should have collapsed. They had to be held together by magic, but nothing emanated from them. From this distance, they looked like rocks. Unnaturally smooth and round rocks.
"Were you going to poke them with a stick?" Keelan growled.
Hakeem looked uncertain. "Yes?"
"When you find freaky shit in the scary woods, you don't poke it with a stick. It can explode in your face. What do you do instead?"
Hakeem clearly didn't know the answer to that question. I almost felt sorry for him. He had just turned eighteen this year, and this was likely his first real outing.
"You ask the Consort. The Consort knows everything."
"Oh," Hakeem said.
Keelan pivoted to me. "Consort, please tell us what this is."
"I have no idea."
Keelan blinked, his teaching moment temporarily derailed. He took a second to recover. "How do we proceed?"
I held my hand out, and Hakeem surrendered his branch. "I'm going to poke it with a stick."
To my left Troy snickered. Owen cracked a smile.
Keelan looked like he was about to suffer a conniption fit.


...
I Love My Wife Not Interested GIF - I Love My Wife Not Interested Taken GIFs

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maobabie's, Ibuprofen Gang t shirt:

...

But in fleecey sweatshirt form because chronic pain goblins need to be cosy at all times.
And so it can be worn while I do exactly this:

Spontaneous bouts of feet-clapping is normal, right?

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Bottoms:

Feral.
Completely feral.
And I can't figure out if I liked it or not.
Which probably means a rewatch, but as if that's a hardship when I'm in pretty much in love with Ayo Edebiri:
Feminism Entourage GIF by Bottoms Movie

Babygirl Prince Henry (Nicholas Galitzine) is the jock himbo of my dreams:
Mad High School GIF by Bottoms Movie

And Ruby Cruz is Ruby Cruz, the first canonically lesbian princess in Disney history and also babygirl/poor little miaow miaow:
So Good Clapping GIF by Bottoms Movie

Hey, Disney! Give Willow back! I miss that dumb show so fucking much!

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Sophie Strand, Ursula K. LeGuin, and Romantasy:

...

You don't have to like it or want to read it, but all genres are necessary in fiction.
Read what you want.
And in the esteemable and goddess-ly words of Hannah Waddingham:


Keeping to the theme:

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Damsel

Ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhh why can't we make epic fantasy anymore?
I knew Damsel was gonna suck when I watched the trailer but I live in eternal hope for the glory days of 80s fantasy movies making their triumphant, campy return, so I gave it a chance.
...
And was soundly fucked over.
It's too clean, y'know?
I'm all for advancement in art, and digital effects can be truly mind-blowing/beneficial to the plot, but in
a lot of ways they've become so advanced that they lack any personality, any texture.
I don't want to look at a perfectly manicured, imagined landscape.
I don't want to count the flawlessly realised scales on a dragon's behind.
I don't want to hyper focus on that weird haze that demarcates the boundary between real and digital.
I want the gorgeously clunky puppetry of The NeverEnding Story.

I want the rolling landscapes of Willow.
#willow from a movie obsessive

I want the lung-compromising glitter of Legend.

And I want humour, goddammit.
All fantasy fans know that even the stories that aren't purposefully funny have humour in them, it's inescapable when you're pottering around in worlds inhabited by mythical beasts, strange fauna, and elemental magic.
It's inherently funny because it's so unlike our reality, and creators seem to have forgotten why that's so integral to the genre and have chosen humble stoicism instead.
All frowns, no fun.
That's not what fantasy-lovers want, Netflix and rivals, not even a tiny bit.
I want a good laugh with my bloody, mythical murder.
And I'm not meaning a full belly laugh, more like a knowing smile, a nose scrunch of silly familiarity, an unexpected chuckle.
Because when you don't have that mirth?
You get Damsel, a worthy, shallow, pretty piece of nothing.
Fantasy is joy and escape, not this, never this.
Talking down to you like you're one of their kids. | Nope gif, Toxic  parents, Giphy

I'm giving it one thing, however: Shohreh Aghdashloo voicing a dragon is gravelly perfection.

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Sharlene Yap and country roads:

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A Discovery of Witches season two:

...
I had hopes for the second season, and this was... not it.
new girl awkward gif | WiffleGif

I made a pact with myself (I'm all about brain bargaining) that I wouldn't watch the final two seasons until I'd read the corresponding books.
I like to read before I watch so I can nitpick to my heart's content, it's my process.
And having read and enjoyed (eventually) the first book, and that adding to my liking of the first season (I still stand by the perfect, almost predestined casting of Matthew Goode), I thought I should continue that way.
...
It's been some, many years and I still haven't cracked open the second book.
I don't even want to.
(No shade to Deborah Harkness' storytelling, I just do this sometimes)
But I did want to look at Matthew Goode in Shakespearean garb.
Because of reasons.
The reasons being this:
Matthew Goode as Matthew Clairmont (Matthew Roydon) in A DISCOVERY OF WITCHES (2018- ….)

This:

And this:

Oh, and this:

The man was born to wear period costume, and he does it so damn well.
But the show?
Bored GIFs | GIFDB.com

I cared so very little for everything going on, I barely looked up from my tablet - not exactly unusual, who doesn't double screen these days, but this time it was notable.
Was it always this boring?
Did the first season trick me?
Was I blinded by Matthew Goode's pretty face?
And why is Marcus the only character I care about now?
Adow GIF by A Discovery of Witches

Okay, I know why, look at this dope.
Edward Bluemel has this effect on me in most things, though, he's such a blorbo.
blorbos from my research

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Joan and a small friend:

If this little guy appeared in my room at night, I think I'd be pretty cool with it.
In fact, I think I'd keep him.

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